First, I love that I’m in therapy. How else would I still be making such large steps in my recovery?

Today, I’d really like to clarify a few points that misunderstood make me look like a jack***.

(music: ON)

– The less I visibly see you or hear you “ROOTING ME ON” the less I consider you a support, on my team or in my corner.

I actively consider myself one of, if not the most open and receptive person I know. Without guidance I do not know what to do with this blank slate. I’m looking forward to tomorrow being great and every single blessing coming my way.

I acknowledge that impatience may be my biggest fault. THAT and “EXPECTING” reciprocity.  

THIS POST WILL BE TAPED TO MY WEEKLY VISION BOARD, THIS MORNING.

Trusting God, circumstances and even people’s best intentions is not always easy on me.

I welcome any distain I get for schooling like a fish. I don’t want that ish either!

“GET ALONG TO GO ALONG” is a statement that I’m not the biggest fan of. I’ll consider myself in an indestructible bumper car for as long as I need to fully stretch my legs, create my own room for error, live and learn and shove every negative thought around til it gets confused.

I do care more about others than I do my own happiness. I’ll state it, I consider myself as selfless as I can be without jeopardizing the progress we’ve made together.

I have 0 problems with people calling me out for showing affection. It doesn’t matter who’s involved. I consider it all a positive. I’m getting the inspiration to express myself, they’re getting flattered and whatever party is still frowning is creating issues that are not needed for me sharing my caring heart, my evolving vulnerability and well-intentioned energy.

Honestly, I’m probably making up still for the negativity here in my home that I expressed last time I stubbed my toe (aka you bailed and left me on my own).

My medical history and success rates are proof that whatever has you upset on any given day is hardly anything worth getting upset over.
I only ever write in first person and refer to “you” in order to help YOU feel included.

I’m putting together this post with no shirt on because I am not ashamed of my body, I do not fear judgement, I just showered and because it feels great!
All three of those facts would get a golden star next to them if they were in anybody else’s book!
I said this last week to my therapist again but it feels good to realize what I expect, what “you” expect and what the world apparently needs to function properly is even more coming from me than anybody else with half the issues I deal with and disregard as tests, does.

I’ve worked hard to get away from the “auto dismiss” mindset but many of today’s distractions are hitting and breaching the overflow release.

My abs impress me. Put your progress first, too!
“Ah, throw some dirt on me and grow a wildflower!”

Oh AND venting isn’t suggested for everyone, apparently!