Plan B
All I really know is MY GO-TO, AUTO INSTINCT, TRUSTED WAY TO PROCEED adding to the conversation is always to base my whole existence around love. That is PLAN A for me! I have had some great teachers.
Some, I’m not allowed to talk about, but that’s fine. Rise above, Kyle! I’m looking at a giant cookie heart inscribed BE MINE. It sparks flashbacks but I hold back feeling good and waving my arms above my head anymore. I mean I could… there’s nobody staring me down right now… but I won’t. That, COULD be considered regressing.
(I’ve been doing things my way lately and I am getting more positive reinforcement than before).
LIVE IN LOVE
LET GOD SORT OUT THE REST
02/16/2021
Sausage Gravy and coffee for breakfast!
02/17/2021
Let them know how you feel, Kyle!
“Fine!”
Honestly, I feel I’ve gone backwards entertaining bullsh!t intimidation. I wake up in tears pretty much daily for feeling I need to deny real feelings. That’s f#cked up. This past Sunday I reached out to the boss at the therapy place. Let him know I no longer feel energized or supported being b!tched out for my writing. That resulted in him listening.
I had the queen clam doing everything in her power to show me how much she wanted me. I had to fold that wet napkin and wipe my nose with it because I felt one wrong move would get me beat to death, crucified and persecuted.
I try to avoid feeling like a martyr being the only one standing up for love/God/Energy.
Those are the feelings I need to hide.
These b!tch therapists get paid to watch me work my @ss off, critique me and complain.
It’s foolish to me to think I’ll get in more trouble for exuding love over chewing people out.
“Yea, baby, I am sorry I’ve listened to opposition telling me I’m not allowed to love you.”
Go ahead Jackie, Erika Victoria, Kim, Kaitlyn and friends. I’m afraid to live in love. I’m afraid to follow the most basic “love one another as yourself” guidance, I’m afraid to feel. One good thing is maybe this will get me served even more therapy to deal with the stress of being misdirected.
Have a good day!
Don’t feel offended by what offends me please unless you’re actively being empathetic to my hurts. Thanks!
02/18/2021
On To The Next One.
Go ahead call me out for half-expecting more. Yesterday, in session I felt like a free-range chicken, finding games to play for 3 full hours on Google. Somebody should tell someone showing up for “work” un-coffeed, still half-sleeping and unprepared does not look good on anyone.
Self-directed therapy? Ok, I came with my list ready. Believe me, if I had control of this thing we call a team, my first E.O would be to replace all but 1 or 2 individuals with better talent. Mike, Jackie, you’re both real cool. Every other “employed” person on this team, gets paid for only doing 50% of what should be done, if that. Sorry!
02/19/2021!!!
02/20/2021
Balls Deep
Ok, mama, you know I love you to death and would walk on nails to bring a smile to your face.
Excuse my frustrations and feelings of being intimidated bringing me down.
I feel damned if I do and damned if I don’t anymore. These juice boxes feel like THEY need to be squeezed.
I wake up with damning voices echoing in my head. That sucks and “individuals” refusing to think outside the box call for more therapy and are more in the way than anything else.
I’m not worried. Those negative emotions and sources of demoralizing energies get categorized as stressors. This is you A, B and C.
Everyone else, good job. Keep up the great work! I love you so much.
(It’s SAD how much “individuals” discourage loving one another, hoping and romancing).
02/21/2021
